Level 80s heading to Northrend?

(Originally posted on Diary of a pr0 Gamer)

While I think this is kinda early as TBC hasn’t been out all that long, evidence has leaked that WoW players will be heading to Northrend at some point in the near future. The sheet music for the Video Games Live orchestra has leaked, and within it, three tracks named Northrend 1, 2 and 3 feature. These are not featured in any other Warcraft game, so in all likelihood, they are new tracks from something entirely new. And what else is it likely to be other than a new WoW expansion?

Though the thought crosses my mind that Blizz have created original music not tied to any game before in the form of Level 70 Elite Tauren Chieftain, that music tended to have more original names than “Northrend 1″, “Northrend 2″ and “Northrend 3″.

Now, my knowledge of Warcraft lore isn’t complete – far from it, in fact, but I am learning, gradually – so I’m relying on WoW Insider (original story source) being correct on this, and I think I trust them: Northrend is associated with Arthas, and Blizz has said in the past that only a raid of level 80 players will really stand much of a chance against him, so we may be seeing Arthas as the boss of a raid instance (Icecrown?) in the next expansion. The final boss of TBC, Illidan Stormrage has also been described as a “Boba Fett type character” implying much more to come, yet. I’m wondering where it all ends; a 400-man raid of level 100s against Sargeras?

Though I think one of my biggest questions right now is, ‘What is the level 80 mount gonna be?’. I mean, we have a land mount and a flying mount. I see two options. Yet even faster mounts or possibly some kind of swimming mount, though I’m not too sure about the latter. Maybe a warp-creature: you could just warp to where you wanted to go. Gotta love speculation. I guess all we can really do is wait for BlizzCon.

Icefox out.

Broaden Your Own Fucking Horizon!

I am starting to feel rather pissed off at people who tell me I don’t read enough books. One may feel this is fair summation these days as I haven’t bought myself a new novel in a year, except I am referring to the type of fucktards who only read James Herbert and Stephen King, alongside a couple of other horror writers who seem to vary between each retarded individual.

Stop feeling so superior just because you read a book the paper recommends. Everyone fucking reads it (except for myself, who is only bored by the authors concerned) and you don’t look any smarter or any more clever, you just look like a man who eats regurgitated shit.

I don’t hate these authors or their books; I can see the value in them, and have no problem with people enjoying their work. But stop pushing them on me like they’re the only fucking authors in a bookstore – and try reading something else for the love of a fake imaginary messiah. you tell me I should broaden my reading horizons. Try it yourself, you fucking twats.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to read some Simon Green… or maybe some Harry Harrison…

Next Week: Stop thinking Vampire Hunter D and Urotsukidoji are the only anime worth watching, YOU CUNTS. (Urotsukidoji is just fancy hentai anyway, you brainless wank.)

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A Quiz for you

I had a thought, all this talk of Killzone 2 made me wonder – Can people even tell the difference between the good shooters these days?

Are “Awesome” graphics really that definitive? Only one way to find out, so I made a Quiz.

10 Pictures, 4 Games. You’ll have to Copy and Paste the links yourself i’m afraid, I was too lazy to find a better quiz site.

http://www.quizyourfriends.com/quizpage.php?quizname=070711200038-435007

You could probably cheat your way through this, and people will obsessive experience in some of the games will score better … But please just take an honest shot at it.

Good luck and have fun.

James

Ps. I actually kinda proved my point whilst making it, because having forgotten to sub-folder the screenshots for each game, I found it near impossible to tell title-from-title, even before cropping.

Pro Evo Travesty

Originally Posted on Nobody Reads This.

I’m writing to criticise Pro Evolution Soccer, one of the worst football games ever made. Many of you will dismiss my criticisms as “He’s a Noob” or “You just don’t get how it works” which may be entirely true, but as a fairly competant video game player, and a Football player myself, there are some problems that need to be seen to.

Problem #1: Friendly AI. Probably the single biggest problem, especially in the newer Pro Evos, is the Computer’s complete inability to manage your team effectively. Your Defenders end up ahead of your midfielders, your midfielders don’t make any runs … Its stupid.

Problem #2: The Referee. The temperment changes from Game to Game, but the most recent iteration is completely ridiculous. He is completely Trigger happy with his Cards, perfectly legitimate tackles get Yellows … You barge into a player, Yellow Card … Omg, he turned away when you were already comitted RED CARD.

Problem #3: Inept Strikers. This is a real kicker, you are inside the 15 Yd box, its an open goal, and you are no less than one of the best strikers in the world. You will still sky it straight over. It happens time and time again, its totally and completely fucking absurd.

Problem #4: It Cheats. And I am deadly serious about this. Example, Stoppage time – So long as the computer is in possession the whistle will almost never be blown. Example, They are losing/drawing with you, Stoppage time, they will get a free kick for pretty much nothing. Example, they virtually never get cards, considering you get one for breathing at them – Thats pathetic.

Problem #5: Set Pieces. Goals from Free kicks are practically impossible. Corners are virtually useless, and defensive free kicks just don’t get you anywhere. 99% of the time you just pass it off, since long high balls have a way of not getting you anywhere.

This game actually got 10/10 in OPSM2, which is absolutely fucking sad. The graphics aren’t great, the commentary is terrible, the AI cheats, the friendly AI is crap, the rosters are rubbish and incomplete.

There. I said it.

James.

Tomb raider: Duplo Edition

I see what you’re thinking, A new Lego game perhaps or maybe a secret that I’ve just found in a Tomb raider game or Maybe a new Kids Tomb Raider?

Well no. Sadly no Lego tomb raider is planned. Instead it’s what I refer the new Tomb Raider Anniversary edition as, because like Duplo – it’s bigger and easier to see what your doing than normal Lego. (Ye oldie Tomb Raider) Also like Duplo it’s far easier to do stuff with. Now don’t get me wrong I’m actually enjoying the Anniversary edition, Crystal Dynamics have done a fine job of recreating the first game.

Take the environments, they’re different but the same if you know what I mean. It’s like going to a theme park then returning after a few years it’s the same layout more or less. But there are new rides and stalls. That path to your old favourite ride has now been moved. Well that’s what playing the new Tomb Raider is like, and I love it. Everything looks better, prettier and smother but that’s to be expected. The way out is a tad different but you still know your way around.

And the puzzles they’re bigger too. Anybody who’s played the original will remember the Fire puzzle in the Midas Section. Your in a room with a pool of water at the other end is a ledge, on said ledge is a Lead bar you need to turn into gold. Now the only way across is a few raised blocks easy. That is until you start to cross and find out they are timed to release fire. Getting across involves carefully timed jumps and grabs.

Now for the anniversary edition it’s essentially the same, but this time you also need to get to two switches, which are in alcoves at the side of the room. So to get to the first switch you need to jump into the water and pull a lever. This raiser a circular ledge with hand holds onto the second platform. so I start to hop my way over there, Here’s where the anniversary edition lets me down, I’ve timed my jump wrong and landed in the fire to my surprise Lara just takes some health damage that’s all, no screaming in pain as she is set on fire like the first generation of games just a loss of health i dont feel as if i’ve been punished for my mistake but rather just a slight tap on the wrist. As for the puzzle it’s becomes easy now infact most of the puzzles are easy but that’s probably because there so similar to the original so I’ve done them all before

There are a few of these niggling disappointments not enough to put you off but there are enough to wish you could do something about them. Take the grappling hook, you can use it to wall run but even with all the help functions turned off the game will still show a big Square button picture where the grapple will latch onto a metal object. This only happens where you can wall run.

Another thing, like PC gamer said the game has really lousy collision detections. I thought seeing as they’re using a Keyboard and not a control Pad it might just be them, but no the PS2 suffers from it as well. Spikes will graze you and cause a lot of damage animals can miss you entirely and you’ll still get knocked down. And this may just be me but you get a bullet time when you enrage an animal normally done by just shooting it. When enraged it’ll charge you and you get put into bullet time with a chance to dodge but with me this only seems to happen when I’m in mid air >_> but worse this game still has those terrible on rails button mash sections. Press X to jump now press R1 to shoot the raptors. Interactive cut scenes like this tend to spoil great moments in the game luckily there are few and far between.

But look past these flaws and you are left with a great enjoyable game when you not fighting it’s tomb raider as I remember here back in the day only nimbler and easier I’d recommend this to anyone who wants to get into tomb raider forget the legends go straight for this. Then when you feeling up to a proper challenge buy your self one of the first 3 games.