EA Fuck Up Contender For Game Of The Year

Another 360 victory, muthafucker!

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~ of the Year

Its nearing the end of 2007 and it’s about now that all sensible people with an ear to the industry start to consider who gets what accreditation, such as Game of the Year. Magazines do have a tendancy to do this on release for every 8+ Game (You know who you are) just for a chance to get themselves stamped all over the packaging … But they’re all douches and we know it.

Allow me to take a few liberties and say what my personal “~ Of the Year”s are:

• Person – Me. James. Hah.
• Dust gatherer – The Nintendo Wii
• Paperweight – The Playstation 3
• Letdown – PS3 Firmware 2.0
• Nonevent – Assassin’s Creed
• Timewaster – Madeline McCann
• Shock – America didn’t start any new wars for us
• Facistic Power Usurper – Gordon Brown
• Dickhole Forum Admin – Bin’jamin
• Comic Book Adaptation – 300
• Movie – American Gangster
• Most Hated Religion – Islam
• Rape Case - Warren Jeffs
• YouTuber - PaulsEgo
• Machinima - Ignus Solus[1]
• Innovative Game – Portal
• Tired Genre – JRPG
• Doorstop – PSP
• Format – DVD
• Disease – Bird Flu (Pretend Flu more like)
• RPG – Mass Effect
• Shooter - Call of Duty 4 / HL2: Ep / Team Fortress
• Multiplayer Game - Call of Duty 4 / Team Fortress/ Halo 3
• Developer – Valve / BioWare / Irrational
• Game – I can’t honestly say. Maybe Mass Effect? Maybe (surprisingly) Call of Duty? Not Halo 3 thats for sure.

One brief note, no videos yet … Be patient. Mass Effect review up on Xbox Elite.

Regards,
James.

Forward unto VLogging

Well i’ve hinted at the idea that WSAG might be dipping into the realm of Video Logging for quite some time now but a combination of stage fright … well e-stage fright and the general lack of video editing skills and tools tended to ward me off.

Now with WeSuckAtVLogging registered and a Modestly Priced Webcam ordered i’ve decided to cast myself into the void. I’m a blogger after all, clearly words are just the pictures of yesterday.

Also worth noting is that I’ve set up the WSAG.com email forwarding service, my contact is james@wesuckatgames.com, Mark can share his if he wants and anything else goes into a generic Gmail account set up for purpose.

I’ve yet to ask Dach or Icefox (still a poster here?) if they want it, but its very much just for show anyway.

Mark has said he might join me as a VLogger, but says I have to go first. So expect an intro video pretty much as soon as I get the gear, and my first Video Rant some time next week.

Regards,
JamesR

Behind the Scenes of WSAG – 12/11/07

The following is an excerpt from an MSN conversation between three WSAG writers saying what they never wanted you to see!

JamesR says:
Time to put our Creative Hats on

JamesR says:
WSAG TEAM UNITE!

Madmarkus says:
MARK- POWER OF INCESSANT RAMBLING!

Robert says:
i was planning to so a halo 3 review but i’ve not found the time

JamesR says:
JAMES- POWER OF STOLEN WEBDESIGN

JamesR says:
I don’t think Rob gets the joke

Madmarkus says:
I don’t think he gets a power

Madmarkus says:
YOU HAVE TO EARN THOSE

Madmarkus says:
NO POWERS FOR YOU

JamesR says:
Anyway

JamesR says:
More Games? or something else?

Madmarkus says:
*wind blows*

Robert says:
i was busy so i’m sorry for not getting the joke

Madmarkus says:
Ehm

Madmarkus says:
We sould just post our conversations up on WSAG

Madmarkus says:
That’s entertainment all in itself

JamesR says:
It has the potentially to be rather funny at times, but mostly racist the rest

Madmarkus says:
Well avoid racism

Madmarkus says:
You filthy nignog

Madmarkus says:
…whoops

JamesR says:
JEWBAIT! JEWBAIT!

Madmarkus says:
This is pointless, Rob is too busy with incest or something

JamesR says:
Master Chief Incest

JamesR says:
TOUCH HIM ******!

JamesR says:
TOUCH HEEEEEM!

Robert says:
well i entered here at the wrong time

Robert says:
you two playing out your fantasy

JamesR says:
Shame you didn’t see my [Clever Retort Card]! Your point is shattered and you lose 20 Life points!

Robert says:
this game sucks, it’s not a awesome as magick

Madmarkus says:
Does one of you wear the limited edition helmet, like “down there”?

Madmarkus says:
(I am a sick man)

JamesR says:
Bit loose surely?

Madmarkus says:
LOL

Robert says:
na it’s a nice fit

Madmarkus says:
…so you do wear it round your cock during gay incest

JamesR says:
^_^

JamesR says:
LOGICAL FALLACY LOGICAL FALLACY

Robert says:
of course, it’s cheeper than a condom

JamesR says:
Condoms are for AIDS patients

Madmarkus says:
no, condoms are for people who get lots of casual sex

Madmarkus says:
So, not any of us

Madmarkus says:
…that’s depressing

Madmarkus says:
I take it back

JamesR says:
It would be, from the only Virgin here

Madmarkus says:
Pfft

Robert says:
dont worry mark

Madmarkus says:
Virginity > Sex with *********

Robert says:
it’s not all it’s cracked up to be

JamesR says:
oooOOOOooooh

Madmarkus says:
DOUBLE BURN

JamesR says:
“it’s not all it’s cracked up to be”
Natural mating call from the guy no-longer getting any

Robert says:
lol

Madmarkus says:
I’ll pass to be honest

JamesR says:
Don’t worry Mark, theres always Tubgirl

Madmarkus says:
The conversation required beforehand is simply not worth the reward

Madmarkus says:
I know nothing about Ovens, I’d be lost

JamesR says:
mmmMmmm … Me either, then theres Sewing … Women ey?

Madmarkus says:
You knock them out and then knock them up, right?

JamesR says:
… When did you get in my room?

Regards,
WSAG Team

Site Stuff

Yes I have changed the template to one of the default Blogger ones and No I have no intentions of designing or stealing one to replace it.

You see, for some bizarre reason, the other template hates FireFox and any derivitive there-of so really it had to go.

I am doing something in the new site department, but don’t bet on anything soon.

And yes I know updates have been slow … Fuck you, i’ve been busy, i’ll try and do some stuff this week. Those of you who read NRT will have noticed the same down times, i’ll try.

Regards,
James.

Ps. Heres a video of Left 4 Dead, personally I think it looks awesome and it is getting a 360 release. Expect to hear more from us about this.

Yet More Sony Hilarity

Though actually in truth this is not actually that funny because it was to be expected. We know a cripple will fall over if he walks, and we know that Sony will now always fuck up when they attempt something. Still, cripples falling over is still one of THE FUNNIEST THINGS EVER TO WATCH, so I’m clearly reading too much into this.

Please note this entire post will rip off UK:R’s news, as usual. If we keep this up they might find out and be slightly displeased with us! That would be AWESOME, but only if we don’t tell them. Somebody send them an email, would you?

THANK GOD, HERE’S THE INTERESTING BIT
The LEGENDARY PS3 2.00 firmware update has ARRIVED on the perverted XBOX RIPOFF, bringing in the DESPERATELY NEEDED and INCREDIBLY USEFUL ability to turn on your PS3 with your PSP ANYWHERE! As long as you’re in a hotspot, which is apparently a small 2cm space in the ANTARCTIC that can be found only with a secret map buried in the tomb of Sony’s HOPES AND DREAMS. They also now have themes, which means PS3 users can now too be ripped off with overpriced official dashboard HACKS. There’s also something about playlists. but we were all CRYING WITH SHEER MIRTH here at WSAG, and were as such unable to read that part. I think it’s another thing the 360 already does anyway.

I’m sure Sony know better than I do, and that these features will be INCREDIBLY USEFUL, but I do wonder where, for example, the In-Game XMB* went. I guess EVIL GREMLINS WORKING FOR MICROSOFT HACKED REALITY and STOLE IT, before going back in time AN ENTIRE FUCKING YEAR and GIVING IT TO THEMSELVES. Gremlins… aren’t they wankers?

Still, here at WSAG the majority of us could make even the best PS3 firmware update EVER look terrible, so in order to show the validity of our point of view, here are some of the most DISAPPOINTED, ANGRY and DEPRESSED quotes from the comments on Threespeech, the Sony owned blog that pretends it isn’t. The original crap spelling has been left in so as to maintain the feeling of a room full of angry spastics:

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well well well

the excitement was well, NOT WORTHY of excitement

SHOCKING

Comment by komp — Nov 7, 2007 @ 4:05 pm

---

“With the potential for new backgrounds to become available on PLAYSTATION®Network in the future, Version 2.00 truly opens up a whole raft of options.”

You gotta be f***ing kidding me! 2.0 brings the ability to turn on the ps3 with a psp and setting backgrounds? That’s it?! F**k you Sony.

Comment by Trond — Nov 7, 2007 @ 4:08 pm

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this has been something that gamers have been clamoring for since the beginning. and it was shown as a feature that would be standard out of the box

Its rediculous they just act like they are just figureing out there is massive demand for it (an option on the GAP survey….) I mean WTF ingame xmb should be IN THE WORKS, and the survey should have been between 3 features we’d never asked about. But with this survey it seems like they are trying to get by as long as possible without XMB access.

What bothers me is that with this announcement they arent even like, we are just about through with ingame XMB and should implement it shortly”, or “we are working through the bugs and it should be out by christmas”. But it seems to me like they are just sweeping it under the rug until they find a more opportune time to give us another feature that should have been there a year ago.

People can say all they want that you should listen to the game’s sound and custom soundtracks detract from gameing immersion, but there are obvious times: designer half a$$ed the music list (motorstorm), online games, driving games, where many people would rather have some of their own tunes overlayed.

Plus I dont think anyone could argue that not being able to send and view messages in game is a good thing.

Comment by nurayi — Nov 7, 2007 @ 6:40 pm

---

And here’s one from a guy who apparently LIKES having SHIT SHOVELLED INTO HIS MOUTH:

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man you guys are a bunch of moaners.

they didnt do what they never said they would.

deal with it.

IF they are going to do it, then they will in their own time. im
sure they have their own reasons for not doing it in two and a half
seconds, but contrary to popular belief, SONY dont actually have magic
programmers who can type at three quarters of the speed of light.

besides if they gave all the features out straight away, what would
be left? it would just be the competition able to update and surpass.

leave SONY alone, they are giving you updates for free. they arnt
making you use them (unless you buy a new game), they arnt making you
pay for downloading them.

instead, thank them for bothering to support a system that costs $1000

as someone said earlier in the blog, if you want a console with xbox2 features so badly what you want is a xbox2.

Comment by Alan — Nov 7, 2007 @ 7:48 pm

---

I love the logic of this post, like the belief you need to type at three quarters of the speed of light in order to program something WITHIN A YEAR and the mistaken thinking that Sony offering features is somehow a BAD THING, like CANCER. Still he’s right, the update is FREE, which is good, because no-one would PAY for it. However I HATE the bad spelling and AWFUL PARAGRAPH STRUCTURE which will probably BREAK THIS PAGE, if these lines haven’t already.

THE OTHER INTERESTING (AND PUZZLING) THING
JAPANESE HARDWARE SALES, WEEK ENDING NOVEMBER 4

DS: 78,597
PSP: 59,714
Wii: 37,617
360: 17,673
PS3: 17,434
PS2: 10,209

Even the PS2 was CRUSHED this week! And that was in Japan! All the Japanese have to do to earn our forgiveness now is keep things this way (well, except for the PSP, possibly the only thing I hate as much as the PS3) and force SQUARE-ENIX to close down or at least promise to stop making Final Fantasy and its endless derivatives.

TRULY THIS WAS A WEEK TO REMEMBER AND CHERISH FOR ALL. PS3 users finally got themes, and us non-braindead individuals got some CLASSIC comedy. We’ll be dividing Sony into 4 like BERLIN any week now.

*Don’t look this up, you have better things to do. Be satisfied that the X stands for Xross, and then quite possibly laugh to death at this stupid misspelling dreamed up by a Sony executive who thinks the letter X is cool and a suitable ALTERNATIVE to the perfectly useful letter C. In Sony Russia, THE CORRECT SPELLING PICKS YOU.

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Bantery – 02/11/2007

I apologise for the sudden stoppage of updates, you can ask Mark why he hasn’t really posted in a while, but I’ve actually got plenty I want to write about including a few movie reviews. Keep an eye out for the following:

A Blacksheep Review, The Kingdom Review, a Saw IV Review, a Bioshock Review, a Halo 3 Review and a Team Fortress Re-review.

In fact; if Mark, Rob or Icefox (presuming he still wants to be affiliated with us) is reading this and wants to do any of the last three, go right ahead.

Now for a word about Mass Effect. W00P! Now for a few more; I have a general principle concerning upcoming titles: Don’t get into the hype. By doing this you minimalise the damage done by overhyped poor titles plus you don’t feel like you’re constantly waiting.

I have however betrayed this principle by allowing myself to get into Mass Effect, I am all too aware of the pitfalls of their design ethos though. I know when they say “Galaxy to explore” they mean a dozen to two dozen depending on the scale on the project. When they say “Explore Planets” what they really mean is visit a few important locations on each … At least, thats what I’ve come to expect.

They could completely shock me and pull off something massive, but I’m going to maintain a fairly conservative series of expecations. I’m sure its going to rock, but i’m not sure its going to be the legendary uber-RPG. And since this is pretty much it before EA makes Bioware churn out “The Sims D&D Edition” I guess i’ll have to enjoy it while it lasts.

I have also ordered “Scene It!” which I’m not entirely proud of. At the same time, I’m a movie fanatic and I really thoroughly enjoyed the demo. So fuck you. Plus, Buzzers ftw.

Regards,
JamesR.